I'm done

I can't bike anymore. Every pedal stroke reminds me of Douglas. All I can think about is riding our big wheels, first bikes, and jumping off stuff together. I trusted, followed him, and he took care of me.

Shane and Dougie built a skate 1/4 pipe growing up and talked me into going off of it on my 'Miss Rocker' bmx. I pedaled into it, went off of it, and flipped over the handle bars. I was okay and he knew--I wasn't going to clear it--but knew I would be okay. We never told mom and dad...stuff like this. I will never have that trust, caring, or love, again.

All a bike does is remind me how much he loved me and how much I love him. My heart is empty when I am riding because I want him with me. I am done.

The last words Douglas said to me were, "Kristen, I love you!"
The last words I said to Douglas were, "I will always protect you and you know how much I love you".

"You are going to love feeling clean...."

I have been getting ready to ride my bike or have been riding my bike for the last 15 hours. I am muddy, sweaty, scraped up, and happy.

Started the morning with Exit 27 with Kat and Jen. Humble is my word of the day. I hated pushing my 40lbs downhill bike up the road and there were sections of 27 that scared me.

Duthie was ride No. 2. Kat was teaching a clinic and Jen and I were lucky to join the lesson because we were 1.5 hrs late. (Sorry Kat!) Corners and berms. I love going fast, pumping my bike, and pushing my heals into the berms...I have to remember to pump, push, flex and extend.

By 4 p.m. we headed to meet up with Dirt Corp and watch 'Follow Me'. Good movie (would have liked to see more of Barrecloth :-) "Follow Me" was followed by a fun BBQ. Thank you Matt and Shelly! Alright....as my roommate just said, "You are going to love feeling clean...". Time for me to take a shower.

Adios amigos---"Hey, who is going to come ride with me?"

And Then Their Were Two.....

May 13, 2010

I decided in order to be successful for my race that I needed to cross train. I have been playing soccer (4-zip, Yeah, Motley Blu!), trail running, and lots of dance. I feel like my heart has to be in the best shape to be competitive.

Last night Jen and I headed out to Paradise to ride XC and pedal. Jen rode a single speed Jamis and I rode a Trek Remedy. I ride with some of the best mountain bikers in the NW and keeping up with Jen on a single speed was tough!

We pedaled for 1.75 hrs, stopped only for me to catch up to Jen and figure out what loop to take. The best part of the night was riding around 9 p.m. without lights. We were riding fast and to take away your sight and just concentrate on your balance knowing that your bike is going to absorb the terrain was FABULOUS!

We got back to the parking lot and it was empty.....and then their were two!

I've Seen the Beauty of the Universe so Peaceful and Serene

I had the toughest time getting out of bed today and them my roomie and closest friend sent me a text that she would ride with me if I got out to their house. Deal was done and I was on my way! The trails were muddy, the wood was slick, I fell off of jump no. 3 (which I have to help rebuild :-) into some soft bushes, and of course we had Tork!

Biggest accomplishment for me is that I dropped in the ladder. The 'Wet Ladder' at least 8+ times. It is super fun to get speed into the jumps. Jen is jumping like a mad woman...she has mad skills.

After the rain kept pouring we decided to sit in the hot-tub, drink water, and watch a movie. A perfect evening to a perfect day!

Pretty Pink Beast & A Pitbull

It has been 10 days since my brother died and I can honestly say that I am grieving, my family is grieving, but we are making it.

Nothing makes me more happy that riding my bike with Tork. People stare when you are on a hot pink bike, Tork on a leash, and pedaling to the trail. Once we make it to the trail Tork is off leash, Tork finds a rock or log for you to throw. This is where Tristyn's rule of me not being distracted by the dog is difficult.

Ex. I am pedaling into a jump and Tork is standing in the transition with a log in his mouth. I start yelling for him to move, he stays put, and I take a tumble. We had to slowly make it back to the house because I thought I broke my bike. Good thing two of my closest friends know so much about bikes and allow me to borrow the dog!

My Brother

My brother passed away on April 21, 2010, at 1:42 a.m. I didn't ride my bike yesterday and I feel like I failed my goal of training for the race. What would he think--I am a failure. I couldn't even get on my bike for 5 minutes.

When we were growing up we had a bmx/skateboard ramp. Dougie talked me into going off the ramp (onto cement) with my bmx bike. I rode in with some speed and ended up flying over the handle bars. He could ride the ramp with his skateboard and his bike.

God, I love him. I will never again hear him tell me, "Kristen, if I can do it you can do it too!"

"The Ashland 12 Mile Super D"

Here I go! June 13, 2010 I will be racing in my first mountain bike race. "The Ashland 12 Mile Super D!" I have never raced before, I have never blogged before, and honestly I am scared of the next 55 days!

So, this is my blog to help hold me accountable for biking everyday until my first race. Yes, I said everyday. Thank you Stephanie for being my inspiration. (Check her out at http://yoga60.blogspot.com).

I started mountain biking in 2003 but I have never committed to riding year round. I ski November - April each year and tend to stay off of my bike in the winter. I love the way I feel in October after I have been riding for six months. I ride Whistler, I have ridden steeps, I have taken big falls. It's difficult to basically start over each year in April. I feel like putting my feet back on the pedals is a huge chore.

Last night was my first night of biking since October 2009. I met up with Jen and Tristyn at their personal trail, "Boys to Men". Sorry, it's top secret and I can't tell you where it is. I quickly found out that my mind and body are not in shape for biking. My biggest challenge was dropping into the jump line. I am scared of the ladder! I spent the evening rolling into the "boys" line wishing that I had more speed...What is wrong with me!?! If I just dropped the ladder, I would feel more comfortable hitting my line.

Jen told me that she is going to make me stand on the ladder and I am not allowed to come down until I drop in on my bike. It doesn't matter how long I am up there or if I cry, I will be dropping in on my bike. Yeah, fabulous idea, can't wait, bring it on Jen. Tristyn told me that my one rule is not getting distracted by Tork (best dog ever). This will be a hard rule not to break.

I am a huge supporter of Transition Bikes http://www.transitionbikes.com and will be rocking my Syren for training and the race. Here is the link to the race http://breakaway-events.net/cms. Well, this girl is off to ride her bike. Going back to "Boys to Men" tonight. Maybe, I will drop in.

Thank you for reading my first post....Wanna come ride your bike with me?